Hello. I am new here. Nearly all my life, I felt like something was... "not right". I could not act "normal" in school and teachers would suggest to my parents that I speak to a psychologist, because I would not participate or interact with other children. I was labeled as "shy", "sensitive", and/or "gifted" throughout my educational career. I was always awkward and extremely uncomfortable around many people, even family. My parents were in denial, even after a violent meltdown during my first year of high school. I ended up dropping out as soon as I was legally able to, because the anxiety was too much, only just barely completing Grade 9. I struggle to make and maintain eye contact, it seems so unnatural for me, even to this day. In the past seven years, I would briefly research ASD, and suspected I was on the spectrum, but never said anything because it would have led to an argument. My parents constantly said nothing was wrong with me, and it was best to let them think I believed it. Now that they are both gone, I am looking fully into my suspicions, every online self-assessment I have taken says it is highly likely I have ASD. I also now realize I had been "masking" all my life, and sometimes not very well. I am now seeking a formal and official diagnosis at age 44. It will explain a lot of my life long behavior and give me validation as well as peace.

Posted by rubysparkle1978 at 2022-10-18 08:56:36 UTC