Hello! This is my first time posting anything- what a great support forum! I have an adult son who is undiagnosed but through discovering AE I absolutely believe he has autism and is in defense mode. He is 20 years old. He struggled to make it through high school, and by his junior year he would have such physical and mental breakdowns (?) that he could not even go to school. I ended up homeschooling him the last year so he could graduate. Since then he had a part time job with a family member but it didn’t last too long. He is in his room 90% of the time and barely leaves the house. I am struggling with how to best support him because there are a lot of roadblocks, the biggest one being that he does not acknowledge that he is autistic & feels my opinion that he is autistic is trying to label him and find something ‘wrong’ with him. So- part of me feels like I should back off and let him live how he wants because who’s to say I’m right? But I struggle with the condition of his room (I lose my dishes and silverware for long periods of time, trash builds up, showers and self care are less than regular, poor nutrition and he’s very thin) and would like more help around the house, especially since he does not contribute financially and money is beyond tight! I’ve tried to identify what could be his motivation but he doesn’t seem to have anything. He spends most of his time online and does have some friends that he plays games with online , and occasionally will go out to dinner with his cousin and their mutual friend, and sometimes even makes it to a family event. There are evenings when he will hang out with me for a few hours and watch tv and/or have some conversations. His older brother (27) can sometimes get him to participate/help out, but he is planning to move out soon so he won’t be around. I’ve thought he might need to apply for disability- but if he doesn’t acknowledge a disability that’s not an option. I guess I’m just looking for any suggestions, or maybe I just needed to spill my thoughts to others that can truly relate to my reality, and without judgement. Thanks for listening 💗

Posted by lisaprice555 at 2024-11-23 16:22:30 UTC