My sister wrote a book about the family. I was the villain. Fortunately I had just finished "Unmasking Autism" I was definitely a disturbed war baby, lugged around with a married but single woman bc dad was in the pacific in his submarine. She was rarely a kind woman and may've been on the spectrum also . She learned to read at the age of 3, she had no friends dosed herself with booze and ciggies and books. The sisters book described me as autistic. High strung, failing in school, crying at the door of the forth grade room, the mother trying to get me into the class. Flapping my hand walking on my toes. Yup at 79 yrs of age I find I'm autistic but have been able to mask it, with my sunglass obsession, no eye contact.. I wear em all the time. I prefer to be alone and when im with a group, I wonder why I'm there. I dont care for concerts, music, sports, wine, I chose not to have children, I helped raise my little sister until she was more independent. age 6, I was 15. Society says must be social but I find my farm, my animals are enuff for me. Most of my friendships dont last for ever. I'm generous. and when I feel I've given enuff, I drop out. I rarely feel lonely.. I'm happy doing receptive things like weeding or knitting. but how many sweaters can you make. I'm am successful in my own way. I have the farm I always wanted. I have a retirement which I share with the exhubby. I love numbers and have a numbers religion I've made up. When I finally felt successful and reconnected with my family. I told I was bragging. No one had social skills in that family I dont call mine.

Posted by Felicitysfarm at 2024-04-20 14:41:11 UTC