I feel like I’m falling apart so I’m just going to spill my heart out on here. I know this isn’t really the right place to do this but I don’t know what to do. Anyone I’m trying to reach out to just ghosts me eventually, even my youth pastors. I’m scared, and I feel like nothing is real. I’m almost 16 and I don’t want to keep growing up. I feel like my mom won’t ever understand anything I try to say, I can’t trust my dad, my friends are all leaving me, and my depression and hallucinations are starting to come back. I was doing okay, why am I suddenly going back now? I recently broke up with my now ex-boyfriend of 2 years, and his best friend has been helping me through it. I haven’t known him long, and it scares me. He’s been so kind and supportive. He’s on my side, because my boyfriend whom I thought I could trust is turning into the person he swore he wasn’t. But this guy, makes me feel things I’ve never felt before, even with my ex. I’m happy and I feel purely safe around him. With my ex, nothing ever happened. It was all routine. I’m scared to trust him, but yet I know I can. I feel bad for not being able to get over my old friend’s death, which I didn’t even know her that well. I feel distant from my mom, and we are constantly fighting. I don’t know what to do. I’m trying to reach out but it seems like anytime I do I just get ignored or pushed away. If any of y’all are reading this, what the heck do I do now?

Posted by Atlx.ntic at 2024-03-04 04:21:02 UTC