Hi everyone, im a mom of a 13 year old son who I suspect has Asperger’s. He is not defiant and I tend to put the effort in on the front end but he won’t budge when it comes to me asking him to share with me why he is upset and he melts down when we have to go someplace new as a family. He wants to leave, gets upset and shuts down. I often find him saying it is not fair. His sense of fairness is his opinion on weather something is worth his time or not. I also have a terrible time getting him to do his homework. I guess since we don’t argue and he’s not stomping around I think we are not in a fight but I have found that I must back off and let him be so we arn’t at an impass. I realize I could never make him do something he refuses to do and I’ve always understood that it’s not about disciplining him it’s simple something he is not capable of doing. In the past when I have pushed a little he ends up crying and really hurt. So I guess I wonder is this the right place to find answers on how to best support him and will he ever be at a place where I can motivate him to do things like his homework? I have tried all logic and he is very smart and logical but nothing I say convinced him to make any changes. Now that he is older he just tells me “I can’t do it no matter what.” I worry he won’t be able to stay in school, keep a job, have a relationship with someone in the future or live on his own. Do you experience this kind of stuff and what advice do you have for me? Of course this is not all of it but the things I am thinking about lately.

Posted by heidireiswig at 2024-01-01 21:47:29 UTC