I'm finding there is a gap in my DSx14's thinking when facing everyday challenges. His default position is to shout at the world and blame everyone else. He then demands I do all the problem solving.  His therapist suggested he write down what help he needs from us in those moments.  But where is any consideration of what he can do? What action can he take to build a toolkit for dealing with the little stressors he faces day in day out? I'm not always going to be there, life will throw hurdles. I'm worried he'll carry on avoiding all responsibility or ownership for getting himself around such obstacles. We've written an accountability contract but he's not happy with the wording around us supporting him to develop his own strategies. We're off on a long haul flight this week and he's already decided it's going to be too stressful for him and what am I going to do to get him through it?  (I have puts lots in place) But I'd like him to be thinking about what he can do to prepare for and negate possible stress. For a starter it would be great to change his language from it will be hard, to it might be hard. Our thoughts are our reality and it seems he's already decided what reality we're all going to face ...  I will be spending the next couple of days practicing my parasympathetic breathing...

Posted by UKmum at 2023-08-07 16:27:34 UTC