I don’t know what’s real anymore. I have struggled with Asperger’s and OCD all my life. I have knowledge and beliefs on many things, like we all do. You all know that OCD causes us to doubt and question everything, even our knowledge and beliefs. This happened often in my life. About 6 months ago, many stressful events have occurred in my life. The events caused massive trauma, devastation and depression. My OCD got worse since then. It’s literally making me doubt and question everything. I mean literally everything. It was affecting my knowledge and beliefs so much that it was convincing me that I was wrong. I don’t know what to do anymore. I became so insecure. OCD makes me ask people for their perspective and views besides my own. A lot agree and some disagree. My mind is making me focus on the ones that disagree rather than the ones that agree. My brain is saying see I told you you were wrong. And then for one day let’s say more people disagree than agree. I start to think that I’m completely wrong as well and it’s fake. I am also a devote Catholic. I pray and talk to God every day. Since the events, I hear Gods voice in me. He tells me that I’m 100% right about my knowledge and beliefs and not to worry about anything. He said I was unique and special in many ways, as you all are as well! But my OCD keeps on getting stronger and stronger. I feel like the enemy is causing many things to make me see and believe the lie that I’m wrong. It’s like my knowledge and beliefs were a complete lie. My opinions are just completely wrong also and setting myself up for failure. My mind was thinking this was the truth the entire time even before the events happened. Saying that these events are giving me a reality check. It’s not just that, OCD makes me think negatively constantly. It’s gotten so bad where I just feel like I want to die. I don’t know what to do anymore. HELP!!!!!
Posted by AnthonyCaronna at 2023-05-04 13:15:54 UTC