My 21 year old (aspergers) lives at home. He chose not to go to college and has really struggled getting and keeping a job. He is working a part time job at a recycling center that hires adults on the spectrum but is only there because we told him he has to work. Our problem is that he is not motivated to do anything he doesn’t think he should have to do or doesn’t “believe in”. This includes keeping his room free from trash and food and dirty dishes, brushing his hair (it’s past his shoulders and he says he likes it messy), getting any kind of job that doesn’t involve Japanese anime (he’s never had an art class and isn’t naturally gifted) or vocaloid (a computer persona that sings). We have tried to tell him he can get a job that pays well (he’s great with computers) and do those things on the side but he is insistent he only do things that make him happy. When he’s not at work he is on his computer or phone with no breaks for anything else except to eat. He ignores our rules to not eat in his room because he doesn’t clean up after himself. He also is very impulsive with money and even after our requests to budge and is helping him create one he won’t stick to it and spends everything he makes - overdrawing his account multiple times. We are just at a loss. He won’t accept advice except from his online community who he says is very encouraging to him. He says he doesn’t want to live with us anymore but there is literally no way he can move out and he’s doing nothing to make that happen. Do we just accept that this is his future?
Posted by thebrogdonbunch at 2023-04-05 13:38:00 UTC