I am a widow on the spectrum and have three teenagers on the spectrum. All three of my boys (as illogical and impossible as it seems) are polar opposites. My oldest is almost 18. He has been diagnosed with ASD level 2. He is quiet, keeps to himself, stays in his room almost all the time and struggles with motivation. He is very smart, but anxiety means he also struggles with doing school work and he is currently having trouble with the concept of looking for a job. My middle child is almost 15. He has several health issues including a severe chronic lung condition, learning difficulties as well as being diagnosed with ASD level 3. He has continence issues and severe emotional regulation problems. He has an assistance dog (Tilly) who helps when we leave the house. While he does have learning difficulties he definitely shows moments which display that he IS smart, he just has issues with communication which mean that he struggles with showing that to others. He does his school work consistently (as long as he believes his brothers are also doing their school work) My youngest son will be 14 shortly. He has a complex diagnosis of ASD level 1 with repetitive behaviour and level 3 social communication. He is brilliant. He is currently teaching himself how to code and has been given some “paid work” through others via Roblox. He is getting paid with application subscriptions so he can do more work rather than cash, but that is what he is asking for and interested in. He has plenty of self motivation to do programming. Nothing else. He keeps dirty dishes and clothes strewn throughout his room, rarely talks with people, and when he does talk it is usually in words that are often not understandable (for instance, yesterday he was asking for some potato chips made by a company called Red Rock Deli. He asked for some Stone Cold.) I have to decipher what he is saying in order to understand what I’m responding to. He does not react immediately to some pretty hefty emotional hits (brother in hospital, pets passing away etc) but once he hits his limit he explodes. This usually involves him grabbing a weapon and threatening someone. All three boys are currently going through Distance Education due to severe bullying in school. The school have threatened to remove my oldest and youngest from their rolls due to lack of work. My oldest is unlikely to be a problem (I can prove to them that this year he has stepped up to the plate and is currently doing everything required) My youngest, however, is not interested in any of the curriculum and because of his own communication and emotional regulation issues, standard schools cannot take him. In the meantime, my own anxiety means I struggle too. I’m not sure how to help all three boys while maintaining my own ability to cope. Any suggestions?
Posted by Girlbunny at 2022-04-20 01:47:30 UTC