Hey everyone, I've been dabbling here for a bit but this is my first time posting. My 12 yo son has diagnoses of ADHD inattentive and unspecified anxiety, but I believe he is autistic (we are getting him re-evaluated in June) with a PDA profile. He also has been struggling with OCD. After 2 years of a steady increase in his struggles, we moved in November and he hit rock bottom. He has barely left the house, just started going outside again in the last month. Does very little school work (we have always homeschooled and he used to mostly be okay with schoolwork until 2 years ago), hasn't showered, eats his meals in his room, and is on the edge of a meltdown all the time. Uses video games & youtube to cope. We put limits on these, and he is slightly motivated by earning time on them to do things like basic hygiene & a bit of exercise. I'm extremely overwhelmed and burned out from doing everything for him and always waiting for the next meltdown. I have three younger kids too and I just can't keep going like this. In addition my husband and I are always arguing about how much I help him. I agree that something needs to change, but saying no to this kid (who genuinely believes he can't do anything for himself) results in major meltdowns. I'm the only one who can help him as being around dad in a meltdown makes things worse. I tend to be okay for a few weeks and then totally melt down myself and give my son a total guilt trip for making me his slave. And then I feel horrible. How can we break this cycle? What course or book would you recommend? I feel so lost and sad and frustrated.

Posted by joanna.n.rodriguez at 2022-04-16 18:40:15 UTC